The Wonky Goat Origin Story..


He awoke to the sound of plundering rain and wind,

He lay in bed taking a mental picture of the warmth and cosy ness before leaping out of bed and tip toeing across the cold and bare floor.  As he took his last bite of toast, he looked out of the window at the mountain side and winsed as the fog enclosed the sky and all that could be seen was smeared water and tops of leafy green trees poking their heads out of the top of the cloud cover. 


He hoisted his hiking bag on to his back and began a slow jaunt to the base of the trail. The higher he climbed, the more beautiful the scenery and scents all around him. Wildlife braving the cold, wet and windy terrain with ease, and not a human in sight.


Every 7-8 kilometres, the traveller would stop for a few minutes to catch a breath away from the water Iogged air, and to wipe the rain away from his face, hands and equipment. As he struggled to see, hear and move, again, the traveller was astonished with the regal behaviour of the many goats, sheep and cows going about their brave business. 


After 3 hours of walking and climbing, the traveller reached the end of the trail. The top of the trail was like a circumference enclosing the weather below. For the first time, the traveller could see what rest above the fog. He sat for 30-40 minutes contemplating the experience and being alone with his thoughts, before his body urged the traveller to seek warmth and sugar for his aching bones. 


The traveller started his decent with a purposeful walk, dismissing any new trails or beauty spots with the mission to find shelter. The fog was thick now, so thick that the trail signs were covered, as was the dotted markings of the trails. The traveller walked for what seemed like an eternity until he came to a sudden and abrupt stop, as barbed wire caged off the further trail section. The traveller began to panic as he looked around for a sign, an object, something to set him in to motion again towards his end goal. He called out in panic and all that returned was a rolling low echo. 


Suddenly, the traveller heard another echo pushing through the near fog - was it another human responding to the travellers call? He heard it again, and again but this time a little closer. Now a dark shape petruded through the fog. As the traveller moved closer, the object stood its ground and rose its head in to the clear air. A goat! Said the traveller. As he turned away, although this new discovery was a disappointment, the traveller felt a sense of comfort knowing that he was not alone on the mountain. As he began a another purposeful attempt at finding another trail, in the background, the sound of robust steps followed him. He turned quickly as if to catch a haunting shadow or a mountain ghost, but there, in the clear 2m path, stood the goat. His face was kind and farmiliar, but his eyes looked like crystal balls, making the goat, the most enchanting creature the traveller had ever seen. As he stood in awe, the goat let out a ginormous deep burp that shook the traveller, and as he did this, he walked past the traveller with ease. The goat turned as he walked ahead a little, and  as he did, his right leg lifted slightly making the goat wonky and gangly from side view. The goat let out another alarming sound as if to beckon the tiring traveller. At this point, the traveller invested a level of hope that the goat may led the traveller to the base of the trail. 


An hour passed and the goat and traveller had monitored each other like a scientist closely monitors a specimen both with caution, and delight.The goat continued to bleep at the traveller, who had taken to bleeping back and fourth which was comforting.suddenly, through the hue of the fog and day light, a bright haze could be seen ahead of the trail. As the traveller got closer, he could see a small tea room with steamed up windows. Delight filled his heart and he turned to  goat - “ you wonky goat - you’ve taken us the right way”. The goat then reared up on to a large grey rock and looked down at the traveller as he walked on down the trail. As the traveller reached the base of the trail, he turned back. There stood the wonky goat, full of majestic beauty, defining the landscape as he still stood staring out from the rock. The traveller let out a final bleep to thank the Goat, and the dark figure slipped back in to the fog.


As the traveller entered the tea rooms, the warmth took hold of his hands and face, and tingled through his whole body to his toes. He slumped down on a wooden chair beckoning the waitress. He ordered. As he removed his rain jacket  and lay it on the wooden chair to dry, the largest hot cup of coffee, and the largest piece of chocolate cake was carefully placed beside him. At that moment, as he drank that hot and creamy coffee, slowly sank his teeth in to the chocolate cake, with the warmth of the world around him, the traveller felt an overwhelming sense of contentment, he took one more look out of the window at the rugged landscape, thinking of that wonky goat, and he smiled to himself with great delight. 


And you know what my Wonky Goat compadres?  The rest is history.